The Results Show: May 23, 2007

I'm three days late! So yesterday after work I stopped by CVS and purchased two pregnancy tests. Last night I didn't sleep a wink. I was wide awake all night just waiting for Jeremy's 5:21am alarm clock to ring so he can get up and get out of the house.

He's finally out of the house and I'm peeing on the stick like it's my job. The test said to wait 3 minutes before reading the result, but I got the BFP (big fat positive) before my pee was even absorbed into the "test correctly taken" window!

I panic. Do I go to work? Do I go to Jeremy's work? Do I call him? No, I can't call him...I can't give him news LIKE THIS over the phone! I pulled myself together, put the test in my purse, and drove to work. Luckily I made it with only three 'close calls'... which without a doubt would have been my fault.

At work, I'm not working. I keep looking at the test. I probably looked at it every minute of every hour I was physically at my desk. Mentally I was in 'holy-shit-I'm-going-to-be-a-Mom-I-can't-say-shit-anymore' land. I decided to surprise Jeremy by writing on the test and giving it to him.

In permanent marker I scribbled: "You made a baby! XXOO 05.23.07". After work I went to Chipotle and ordered two burritos with extra foil and napkins. I wrapped the test in the napkins and then wrapped it in the foil.

Jeremy was delighted to see the fast-food Mexican in hand, but little did he know what was inside! As he unpacked the bags he asked, "What's in this little package?" I replied, "Wet naps". Puzzled, he then opened the foil package. This was followed by silence, a look of confusion, and the question, "Is this a test?!"

The next few minutes were a blur. We hugged. We ate. Jeremy really didn't say much as I think he was in shock, especially it being our first try. A couple more minutes pass and he mumbles, "Well, I'm pretty much good at everything I do, so why should making a baby be any different." We both laughed.

I took another test to be sure, and it was a + as well!

Do We or Do We not?

Since October, Jeremy and I have been going back and forth on the "Do we or do we not try to ruin our self-centered lives by conceiving?" After a second-honeymoon to the Riviera Maya at the beginning of April, we decided that we'd give it a go when I ovulated at the beginning of May.

After this decision was made, I quickly logged on to EBay to purchase the infamous 'Fertile Focus' ovulation predictor. It's a cheap little microscope in which you drop a healthy dollop of your stale morning spit onto the lens. When you are getting ready to ovulate or actually ovulating your saliva gets a "ferning" or "crystalizing" pattern to it. And once your spit dries, you push the LED, focus in on your spit patch and check for the ferns!

I quickly became obsessed with this little lipstick-sized contraption. I would wake up at all hours of the night just checking the clock to see if it was time to put my spit to the test. I found it hard to wait the 5-10 minutes for my spit to dry. So, I'd put it under the fan in our bedroom or turn my hair dryer on it (on the 'cool' setting, of course). This wouldn't satisfy my obsession as I would then feel like I wasn't getting an accurate read, take the thing to work and test in mid-afternoon.

Finally...ferns and crystals...a girl's best friend. Or, so I thought. And so did the dear husband. WRONG. One might think..."This is going to be great. We get to do it all week! This is like the best week ever." Again, WRONG.

When you aren't 'doing it' to make up, because you are drunk or just because you are newlyweds and you start 'doing it' to conceive, it really changes the entire dynamic. Let's just say we were like two virgins on prom night...we were scared, we weren't sure 'if we were doing it right', and we were doubting our decision the entire time.

But, we've got our fingers crossed!