10.30.2007

10.25.2007

I'll Be Right Here....



When I was 5 years old I saw E.T. with my mother and grandmother in a movie theater. Apparently I cried from the time Michael found E.T. pale and dying in the creek until the end of the movie. I saw it again when it was re-released with my mother and grandmother in 2002. Again, I cried.

Last April, Jeremy and I vacationed in Florida and went to Universal Studios. We rode the E.T. Adventure, and sure enough, I cried.

However, no emotional breakdown yet can begin to touch the episode I encountered when watching E.T. a couple nights ago on T.V. I was all snuggled up in bed with my E.T. stuffed animal (its finger and heart light up AND it talks), and sure enough I started crying as soon as I saw E.T. lying sick in the stream.

The difference between me crying at home and in theater, is the length of time I cried. I cried through every commercial. And just as I was pulling myself together, Gertie starts bawling at the sight of little E.T. starting to flat line.

Pregnancy hormones + E.T. = Me, a bawling mess.

Even my poor husband wouldn't stay in the room with me...he left and didn't come back until after the movie ended.

I heart E.T.
Is anybody with me?

10.19.2007

The Nursery Project

The nursery is well under way, and practically finished! The walls are 'Yellow Lettuce' and the furniture a mix of natural wood and dark maple. The crib, dresser, changing table and rocker are in their respective places and the bookshelf and caterpillar have been hung on the walls. Jeremy has been a busy little bee!

Once the room is finished...curtains up, rug purchased and in place, and wall decorated above the crib, I'll post pictures. In the meantime, here is the room layout...

10.17.2007

I'd Like a Catheter Please!

On average, I bet I make about 15 trips to the bathroom in a 24 hour period. It's similar to 'breaking the seal' when you are drinking...without the added benefit of a buzz.

I don't mind the frequency at home so much (except for the middle of the night). It's the at-work and in-public restroom trips that wig me straight out.

Yes, I use the potty protectors. However, I can't help but think about whose ass was on the seat before mine. And, because of my frequent trips, how many asses am I coming in contact with per day?

Luckily I'm usually in and out in under a minute. However short my stall time, the experience is kind of like an ass hand shake...you know you have to do it, it's quick and painless, and yet you have no idea where that hand has been.

That being said, I'd like a catheter please.

10.08.2007

Jump Starting Your Baby: 101

Is your husband disappointed he's not getting to feel the baby kick? Do you find yourself putting his hand on your belly and saying "Feel it?" only to get a "No" response every time?

Odom's Tennessee Pride* has the recipe to turn this situation around! After all, no husband should miss out on the great joy of feeling those precious little baby kicks!

What you'll need:
• 1 pound frozen meat (we prefer hot sausage)
• 1 washcloth

Instructions:
1. Wrap the frozen meat in the washcloth
2. Lie on your side
3. Position the wrapped meat under your belly
4. Wait for the baby to start kicking like a champion

*OTP does not recommend nor condone the use of their products for jump starting babies. This technique was actually recommended by a friend (For privacy purposes, I'll call her 'Merideth', wife to Nate, and mother of Abby and Natalie) whose original suggestion was to use a cold beer can.

**Caution: This may insight a kicking frenzy which could last all night long, keeping you up all night long... which is the baby's little way of saying, "Mom, Dad... don't f*ck with me. I may be young, but paybacks are a bitch."

The Birthing Plan

What to Expect When You're Expecting (although a bore to read and the majority of it doesn't even apply to anyone having a 'normal' pregnancy) advises the reader to develop a Birthing Plan. Me, a lover of anything planned, didn't hesitate to start rattling off the birthing plan topics to Jeremy, so that we could start discussing our options.

One of the points of discussion was how quickly after the baby is born do we, the parents, want to hold our baby? Do we want them to weigh the baby first, put it on my chest first, etc.

Jeremy quickly pipes up with, "Do you think they'll wash its horns off first?"

To which I cluelessly reply, "What do you mean?"

..."You know, cause the baby will be a demon."

So, now I'm convinced my husband actually does believe I am baking demon spawn. After all, he's brought this up on more than one occasion.

10.02.2007

I'm No Hussy!

That's right. I got married and then I got pregnant. That being said, nothing bothers me more than the fact my hands have swollen to the point I can't wear my beautiful engagement ring and wedding band.

For as long as I can remember, I've always done a "ring check" on any pregnant woman I've run across. Just curios, I guess. Until now, however, I'd never thought about the fact these ringless women may actually be married, but aren't able to accommodate their tokens of commitment.

I waited for over 30 years to snag me up some bling, and now just over a year later, I'm once again sporting the naked finger.

To comfort me in my time of need, this $15.00 sterling silver ring from Target is filling in. It's fat and ugly, but in the presence of strangers, somehow puts me at ease.