1.03.2008

Near-Death of the Ironing Board

In researching 'breech births' I found many home alternatives to the doctor-performed Version. Acupuncture, visualization and various gravity-defying positions top the charts as common techniques used by mothers to aid in the turning of their child.

Jeremy and I decided to try the IRONING BOARD technique. This involves lying on
an ironing board, upside down, at a 40-45 degree angle for at least 15 minutes daily. The theory behind this makes total sense, however the logistics do not.

Why, you ask?

1. An ironing board is not meant to withstand the weight of a nearly 200-pound pregnant woman.

2. A nearly 200-pound pregnant woman is not meant to lie upside down at a 45 degree angle. Not only is it a feat in itself to get in the damn position (picture Jeremy pulling my body up the board by pulling on my ankles) the weight of the baby on my chest and lungs nearly made me pass out.

I made it 10 minutes.

(And yes, I used "nearly" twice when describing my weight, as I haven't hit the 200 mark yet...it's just creative writing – you know, trying to set the scene.)

3 comments:

Mimi said...

Too funny...and a great visual ;)

excruciatingly said...

You mean people still IRON CLOTHES?

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